


How Does Forever Sound to You?

by The_Sexiest_Eggplant



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Angst, M/M, Modern AU, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, RvB Angst War, Serious Injuries, sad boyfriends
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 19:10:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6127159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Sexiest_Eggplant/pseuds/The_Sexiest_Eggplant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wash hasn’t visited him since the funeral. It’s been a year. Modern AU in which Tucker and Wash were in the same platoon.Part of the RvB Angst War</p>
            </blockquote>





	How Does Forever Sound to You?

**Author's Note:**

> This AU is set in 2005.   
> Prompt: Character A visits Character B's grave" Characters of your choice.  
> Requested by @100wordsummaries from tumblr.  
> If you guys have any more requests for me, feel free to send me an ask at my tumblr, the-sexiest-eggplant!

There weren’t many nights left where David Haight didn’t find himself in various cheap bars around downtown Seattle. Even fewer were the nights he found company there. He had been at a small dive for about forty-five minutes when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

“Hey there, stranger. You come here often?”

Wash looked behind him to find an old face, Elias “York” Capello. He smiled as he turned to his fellow veteran. “Only every other day,” he said, pretending to joke, “I’m kind of an alcoholic now.” He rose from his seat to hug him, then offered him the seat beside him. The older man waved down the bartender for a drink as he sat down. “How’ve you been, York?”

He laughs a bit at the nickname, “It’s been awhile since I’ve been called that. I prefer Elias now. There’s just too much with that nickname.”

“So I’m guessing your answer is ‘not great’, huh?”

Elias took a long sip from his drink. “No,” he says with a sigh, “not necessarily. I’d say it’s more like ‘better’ these days. It’s been hard, but I’m getting through well enough. What about you, man? I haven’t heard from you in forever. Are you still in?”

The silence between them was heavy and it took David a while to choose the best words. He leaned down to pull up his pant leg, revealing a prosthetic. “Honorable discharge. It’s been about a year now.”

“Shit, Dave, I’m sorry. You should’ve called us. You know we would’ve been there for you.” Elias quickly moves his gaze back to David’s face, remembering the feeling of degradation he got when he saw the unnecessarily pitiful look from his friends and family after his own incident.

“I know… It was just hard, you know? I tried to, don’t get me wrong, but I knew you all had so much to deal with on your own so I just… didn’t,” he replied. It wasn’t just his old platoon, though. He didn’t tell Elias that part. He spent a year, almost entirely isolated. He spent his days working at an old consignment store, and his nights either at home or at random bars around the city.

The both continue to nurse their drinks in silence until Elias speaks up again. “You know, you’re always welcome to come back. We all meet at the vet center on Marginal Way every Sunday. It’d be great to have you back again. You seem like you’ve been having a rough time lately, maybe you can come and talk about it. I know it sure as hell helped me.”

David gave him a small smile. “Yeah, I’d like that. Maybe I will.” He considers ordering another drink, but decides for the first time in a while that he’s had enough. “Eli? Can I ask you a question?”

“You just did, my friend,” he says with a snarky grin.

It earns him a chuckle. “I see you haven’t lost your humor.”

“Of course not. I’m still charming as ever! What’s your question, though?”

“When you got back,” he started, “did it take you a while to visit Damian?”

It was a hard topic, one that Elias certainly wasn’t prepared for. They had lost Damian “North Dakota” Lazarov on their last mission together over three years earlier. No one had taken it well or even properly coped with the loss, especially once they were reassigned. 

Another sip from his drink and Elias spoke again, “Longer than it should’ve. And I’m not just talking about my stay at the hospital. I wasn’t able to attend the funeral. I was still in recovery so flying out to Virginia wasn’t an option. Afterwards, I couldn’t bring myself to go. I shut everyone out, and I regret how I acted.”

“How long did take, Eli?”

He sighed, “I didn’t go to see him for a year and a half, give or take. It was too hard, but it was hard for everyone. It wasn’t an excuse.” Elias’ voice broke a bit as he tried to keep himself together. He took a deep breath before continuing, “I see him every month now. I bring a nice lunch and I sit down next to his headstone and I just talk to him. I won’t lie, it hurts a lot, but I love him and I think it’s important for him. I want to make sure he’s always remembered. Sometimes Alexa joins me. She doesn’t usually say anything, but I don’t think her brother would particularly mind.”

David nods and they sit quietly for a while longer, both of them just appreciating the company.

“I hate to pry, David, but why’d you ask?”

The tears were already welling up but David pushed forward nonetheless. “There was a guy in my platoon, Lavernius. The situation was a lot like you and Damian. You of all people know that it isn’t allowed, but we were careful enough that no one ever knew. Either way, we were under attack on our last deployment, and he suggested that the platoon split so that we could get a better advantage. It was a sound plan. I mean there were risks, sure, but there are risks with any plan. It was a hell of a lot better than sitting around and taking fire. So I agreed and we split up. Our platoon sergeant and platoon leader were nowhere to be found so we took charge. I took one half, he took the other. We didn’t get very far before we heard the explosion…” he wiped his eyes, and struggled to finish, his hands shaking. “We didn’t know that they had that kind of weaponry. We should’ve assumed that they did, but we just didn’t. I just… If I had… I should’ve stayed with him.”

“You couldn’t have known that, David. You can’t blame yourself.” Elias placed his hand on David’s shoulder, comforting him. “You said you’ve been back for a year?”

He nodded, “They were able to postpone the funeral until all of his family and friends could be there. It was... He wasn’t… They didn’t have... “

“I get it, David, you don’t have to talk about that part.”

“I couldn’t stay after… I haven’t been since.” He stared into his empty glass, unable to look at Elias.

“If you want,” Elias started slowly, “I could come with you. If not, then that’s okay too, but I think you should go. It’s just going to get worse, David. You need closure.” He grabbed a pen from his pocket and scribbled his number on a spare napkin. “If you need to talk, or if you plan on going and need me to come with, don’t hesitate to call.”

The younger man folded the napkin and stuffed it in his pocket. Laying money on the bar for his drinks, he stood up to leave. “Thanks, Elias. I needed this. I’ll make sure to keep in touch, but I think I just need to go home for now.”

“Do you need a ride? Caity’s gonna be picking me up in about half an hour,” he offered.

“No. Thanks, though. I think I’m just gonna get a cab. Maybe I’ll see you on Saturday, man.”

Elias smiled softly, “I’m sure that’ll make everyone’s day. I’ll see you later.”

David returned the smile and gave him a little wave before walking out of the bar and began his usual march home. He needed time to think.

* * *

It took a while to convince himself to go. There was a million and one reasons not to go _(I’ve waited to long, he wouldn’t want me to, I’m ashamed of myself, I don’t know what to say.)_ but his one reason to go overcame all of them. Tucker deserved to be remembered, and David owed him that. Once he got over his hesitations, it was just a matter of waiting. Waiting for his leave to be processed, waiting for tickets, waiting for the flight itself. He managed to find himself in Virginia by the end of the month, however.

The weather was surprisingly warm and bright, but David couldn’t help but feel that it didn’t quite fit the occasion. On his way to Arlington, he stopped by a small flower shop, picking up a simple bouquet of rhododendrons. He had never gotten flowers for Lavernius before; he never had the chance to.

It was overwhelming, the cemetery. Rows and rows of stark white headstones stretched before him, and he immediately began to feel suffocated. All of his doubts from the past month arose once more. _I shouldn’t be here, I have no right._ Before he could turn around though, he was approached by a young woman.

“You looked lost, dear. Can I help you somehow,” she asked sweetly. He couldn’t help but feel calmer when she smiled cheerfully.

“I’m, uh, I’m looking for the headstone of Lavernius Tucker. He served in Afghanistan in 2004.”

She lead him to a small office and helped him find where he needed to go, walking him to the grave and asking him about Lavernius on the way. When they arrived, she left him to his own thoughts. David just stood in front of the grave for several minutes, unsure how to continue. It took all his strength just to hold himself together. Eventually, he brought himself to sit by the headstone, placing the flowers gently on the grave.

“I saw these and I thought you might like them. I know it’s probably cliche but you’d probably appreciate that.” He took a shaky breath, fighting to keep himself composed. “I’m sorry, Tucker. I really don’t have an excuse. I should have been here for you. I should have been _there_ for you, but I wasn’t. I wanted to tell you to come with, but you just… you were so set on leading and I knew you could so I let you. I should’ve been selfish, I should’ve taken charge and told you to leave with my squads. I just feel like every decision I made was the worst.” He chuckled a bit, despite the tears that fell down his cheeks. “Sound familiar? I know I should take my own advice, but I miss you, Tucker. I don’t want to let go.” Dropping his head to his knees, he breaks down, sobs wracking his body.

He stays there until he loses track of the hours, sitting in silence and trying to find the words to make things better. He’s only interrupted later when a young man walks up to him with a confused look on his face. “Washington? Is that really you?”

David looked up to find one of squadmates, his old crew cut grown out into a mess of curly locks. The golden retriever by his side sat obediently, and David could just barely make out the words on the side of its vest: “Service”. “Caboose,” he responded fondly, “It’s great to see you.” He stood up and slowly approached him, unsure how the service dog would act, but Caboose had quickly closed the distance, practically tackling him with a bear hug.

“Washington! It is so good to see you! I didn’t think I’d ever see you again! I thought if I kept visiting Tucker, then maybe some day I would see you again, and I was right! I can’t believe it’s really you, Washington!” As he let go of David, he kept his wide grin.

“Actually, Caboose, I go by David now. I don’t need the nickname anymore. I’m really glad we ran into each other, though. How have you been?” They both walked down to the path and sat down on one of the benches.

Signalling to his dog to lay down, Caboose continued speaking. “I’m doing okay, but the doctors like to see me a lot. I think it’s silly but they say it is Nesquik fairies.”

It hit David quite suddenly that Caboose had been near the other squads when they were attacked. He couldn’t imagine the extent of his injuries, but it couldn’t have been good. “I think they meant necessary, Caboose.”

“Yeah, that’s what I said, Washington.” David didn’t bother to correct him on the name again. “Oh, I almost forgot,” he exclaimed as he reached into the pocket of his jacket. He placed a silver chain into David’s hand. “I thought that maybe you would want these because you were always with Tucker and Tucker was always with you and I know you loved each other so it was very important that I kept these safe and I thought if I carried them I would find you and I did. Tucker told me that if anything bad ever happened, it was very important for me to give this to you because he would not be able to give it to you himself and I did so now Tucker will be happy!”

“Caboose, we weren’t… We didn’t…” he was about to give his usual defense when he looked at the chain in his hand. It felt like a ton of bricks were dropped on him. Connected to the chain were two military ID tags punched with Tucker’s information and a simple silver ring with an inscription along the inside: _“Can I kiss you forever, David?”_

* * *

It wasn’t uncommon for the two of them to stay up late. Neither could sleep very well, always worried, always vigilant. It had gotten to the point that they switched roommates, their squadmates tired of having to switch rooms every other night. ‘Why don’t you two just bunk together?’ they would ask. It only made sense.

They tried to keep their voices hushed and their laughing to a minimum. It was far too late for them to be staying up, but it was the smallest of moments they could get together, joking around and talking about their pasts, the brief times they could truly feel happy. Neither of them could remember what prompted Tucker to tickle David, but when he finally relented, the two of them laid breathless on the bunk, softly laughing.

Their first kiss lasted for what seemed like ages; they were lost in each other. When they finally broke apart, David could only find six words to say: “Can I kiss you forever, Lavernius?”

Tucker could never quite get that thought out of his mind.


End file.
